Emotional Intelligence: The RULER Approach
Why is emotional intelligence important for athletes? It leads to emotional regulation. We all know an athlete who is able to more efficiently emotionally regulate themselves (calm themselves down when they're in overdrive or enhance their focus and motivation, for example) are poised to perform better than those who cannot do so.
Dr. Marc Brackett is the founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale, and author of the book, Permission to Feel. He's behind the simple but effective evidence-based approach to social and emotional learning (SEL) known as RULER. It stands for:
R: recognize emotions in yourself and others
U: understand the causes and consequences of such emotions
L: labeling emotions with specificity
E: expressing emotions in accordance with cultural norms and social context
R: regulating emotions with helpful strategies
No matter your age, what sport you play, or where you are, it's easy to see why the RULER approach can help emotional regulation in people no matter the domain.
Emotions can be convoluted and feel abstract; using this approach helps simplify the what, the why, and the what now?
In the past, we've talked at length about the tools that come into play when regulating emotions:
Awareness - understanding what emotions you're experiencing and why. This involves metacognition - thinking about your thoughts. This is difficult while under stress, so being trained to take a step back is crucial!
Thoughtstopping - Once awareness is inserted into the equation, your next job is to stop the thought (or behaviors) that might be reinforcing the emotion. Imagine a stop sign, focus on a sense that brings you back to the present, or turn your spotlight of attention on to a different subject, like people in front of you or technique in a sport.
Reframing - our tried and true method of reframing our thoughts shines greatly in emotion regulation. After all, thoughts weigh in heavily on the emotions we experience. Sometimes, you're engaging in the wrong perspective and aren't seeing the whole picture. Other times you might need to enact some gratitude to change your thought patterns. When all else fails, acceptance is a powerful route forward despite it not seeming appealing at first.
Emotional regulation, whether it's through the RULER technique or something else, is a process. It does not happen overnight, and you might need a variety of tools throughout your life. Once you experience the relief and empowerment that is having some control over your emotions, you'll be motivated to so and continue to hone your mental game. The best part? Your performance in practices and games will noticeably improve.
